Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
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