well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Randomize
