I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
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