WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
