I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Randomize
