i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Randomize
