Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
