matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
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the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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