At least make sure they are 18
Why
how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Randomize
