I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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