You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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