he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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