He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
