When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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