why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
There are leaves in my underwear?
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