I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
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