At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
