I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
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