Dude, this old lady messaged me on Facebook talking about her grandson and wanted to know shit about me. I'd almost call her a cougar except she looks like mashed potatoes that have come alive.
Acid is not a monday night drug
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
Randomize
