my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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