Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
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