Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
he was CRYING into my vagina
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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