he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Randomize
