no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
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