how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
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