I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
People with herpes should wear stickers.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
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I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
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Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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