My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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