so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
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