Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
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