How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
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