some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
