is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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