i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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