There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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