this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
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