My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Randomize