I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
