my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Randomize
