You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
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