bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Randomize
