Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize