I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
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i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
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she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
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