Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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