id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize