doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
