i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
My ass is underappreciated
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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