Texts From Last Night

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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Where did you get a picture of my penis

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  (610): Where did you get a picture of my penis http://tfl.nu/yfi8
  Replies (11) Good night (1155) Bad night (592)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  The girls stopped by my apartment. They caught me naked with a nearly empty bottle of vodka in one hand, drawing crop circles in the carpet with the vacuum.

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  (630): The girls stopped by my apartment. They caught me naked with a nearly empty bottle of vodka in one hand, drawing crop circles in the carpet with the vacuum. http://tfl.nu/5o8q
  Replies (9) Good night (4391) Bad night (775)
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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited

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  (413): I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited http://tfl.nu/vv7z
  Replies (31) Good night (7302) Bad night (484)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.

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  (717): this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success. http://tfl.nu/z2ja
  Replies (21) Good night (9786) Bad night (1657)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.

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  (207): She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird. http://tfl.nu/49lo
  Replies (20) Good night (7700) Bad night (2038)
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  he is a creepy guy.

  (1-937): View more from Ohio

  yea thats what heroine does to ppl.

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  (937): he is a creepy guy. (1-937): yea thats what heroine does to ppl. http://tfl.nu/28ly
  Replies (14) Good night (785) Bad night (4067)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.

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  (440): Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing. http://tfl.nu/eukd
  Replies (36) Good night (1288) Bad night (3382)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.

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  (412): he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night. http://tfl.nu/6lcj
  Replies (39) Good night (1306) Bad night (7619)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.

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  (603): Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk. http://tfl.nu/ivw8
  Replies (32) Good night (17910) Bad night (1320)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard

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  (317): i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard http://tfl.nu/sbl9
  Replies (10) Good night (1069) Bad night (3179)
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  (507): View more from Minnesota

  Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.

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  (507): Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization. http://tfl.nu/k6sn
  Replies (5) Good night (1428) Bad night (449)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.

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  (202): Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out. http://tfl.nu/48b9
  Replies (17) Good night (2170) Bad night (951)
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?

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  (604): True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame? http://tfl.nu/gz7a
  Replies (4) Good night (446) Bad night (894)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line

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  (850): You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line http://tfl.nu/4oya
  Replies (3) Good night (547) Bad night (204)
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  (256): View more from Alabama

  I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.

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  (256): I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night. http://tfl.nu/dalv
  Replies (0) Good night (323) Bad night (137)

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