quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
stop calling my apartment porn island.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
