The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize