dude i'm inner monologue high
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
