Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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