I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
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