i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
