girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
